Little Willie (WARNING!!!!: Morbid humor)

Well I stumbled upon these gems a little while ago, they're called "little Willie" poems or some such. I thought they were hilarious so i figured i'd post them.

-Matt

Little Willie hung his sister,
She was dead before we missed her.
Willie’s always up to tricks!
Ain’t he cute? He’s only six!

Willie poisoned Father’s tea.
Father died in agony.
Mother was extremely vexed.
“Really, Will,” she said, “What’s next?”

Into the family drinking well
Willie pushed his sister Nell.
She’s in there yet because it kilt her.
Now we have to buy a filter.

Little Willie on the track,
Didn’t hear the engine squeal.
Now the engine’s coming back,
Scraping Willie off the wheel.

The ice upon our pond’s so thin
That Little Willie’s fallen in!
We cannot reach him from the shore
Until the surface freezes more.
Ah me, my heart grows weary waiting---
Besides, I want to do some skating.

Willie saw some dynamite,
Couldn’t understand it quite;
Curiosity never pays:
It rained Willie seven days.

Willie with a thirst for gore
Nailed his sister to he door.
Mother said with humor quaint,
“Willie dear, don’t scratch the paint.”

Little Willie fell down a drain;
Couldn’t scramble out again.
Now he’s floating in the sewer
The world is left one Willie fewer.

Willie, in one of his nice new sashes,
Fell in the fire and was burnt to ashes.
Now, although the room grows chilly,
We haven’t the heart to poke poor Willie.

Willie coming home from school,
Spied a dollar near a mule.
Stooped to get it, quiet as a mouse.
Funeral tomorrow at Willie’s house.